The man from Bryan, the natty nut, and the balloon boy

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10/19/2009
Of course, you're probably wondering what the headline means. I found myself thinking about false alarms this morning upon reading a catchy headline--Alleged pork chop theft a false alarm--and saw a developing trend in some of the stories I came across in my Google Alerts. This blog post's headline refers to three stories with the common theme of people making stuff up, causing an unneeded and expensive emergency response and then, I'm sure, wondering what all the fuss is about and why they're being treated like criminals. The first story is about a guy from Texas who called in a hoax 911 call about his grandmother having chest pains. The caller then gave the dispatcher a fake address. That is just not cool. Waste of time, tempting karma with your grandmother's wellbeing... This kid should be locked up. It's curious to note his middle name is Wayne... which, if you follow News of the Weird means that he is, according to scientific proof, destined to most likely be a serial killer... Let's save him from himself and put him away now. The second story is out of New York and concerns a guy--probably mentally ill--who authorities assume pulled a fire alarm in order to vacate the firehouse and then slip in while emergency responders were out investigating the false he caused. Again, waste of time and money... another guy who would be better off locked up. And probably the worst of the lot is the balloon boy's father, who we now realize put his son up to the hoax so that he could get his own reality show. I won't, in this blog, call this guy the many names that come to my mind right now. Another guy who's lies and pathetic need for attention cost tax payers a lot of money. He should also have his kids taken away from him and be locked up. False alarms are not cool. They're a huge problem to the alarm industry and to municipalities and emergency responders. People who incite false alarms and panic on purpose, to gain attention need to be locked up. Just my opinion. I welcome yours.