Okay, so the New England Patriots cheating scandal has officially reached the realm of the ludicrous. Now comes word from Kimmons Security Services, an outfit based in Houston doing investigations and debugging and the like, that head honcho Rob L. Kimmons thinks law enforcement should investigate the team for possibly audio-recording opposing teams' offensive audibles. "If this is true," Kimmons writes in a press release that was distributed through all the normal channels, "and conversations were covertly intercepted without participants' knowledge, this could very well be a criminal offense. In most states, at least one party in a conversation must know it is being intercepted or taped, or a criminal law has been violated. Some states require all party consent for audio monitoring." Okay, that's all well and good, but is this really the way you'd like your tax-payer-funded law-enforcement officers spending their time? Investigating whether the Patriots illegally taped their opponents? Mightn't we simply let the league police their own on this one? If Kimmons was serious about this, woudn't he have researched which laws actually applied in New Jersey? Hey, I'm all for attention grabbing by companies who'd like to get themselves on ESPN or CNN. That's what American mainstream media is today, a giant opportunity for building your brand. But this seems particularly shameless. For one, it implies that the law-enforcement types whose jurisdiction is the Meadowlands aren't aware of laws surrounding audio surveillance. For another thing, something makes me think this guy is a Texans fan. Look, it's not the Patriots' fault your team didn't draft Vince Young. And just because you're 2-0, don't start thinking you're going to the Super Bowl.