One, two, buckle my shoe

Nineteen years of security precedent were overturned on July 8 as the TSA repealed the rule requiring passengers take off their shoes for security screenings.

Foul things are afoot with this recent ruling that much is sure. I can’t say it hurts my feelings to not have to go through the extra effort of removing my shoes every time I go through airport security anymore. Any frequent flyer can recognize the TSA line for the inconvenient quagmire of human misery that it appears to be. However, this one slim perk doesn’t do a lot to assuage my concerns.

If you need a history lesson this particular rule was implemented as the result of a failed terror plot by Richard Colvin “Shoe Bomber” Reid, who attempted to detonate explosive laden sneakers during a transatlantic flight in 2001. Occurring only months after 9/11 it was a sharp lesson in the need for updated security measures for vulnerable travel infrastructure.

So, naturally it took another five years to implement.

Yeah, it sucks to have to cold foot it across filthy airport floors, guys, but I will relent on this one position of creature comfort that it’s also pretty nice to not have someone’s shoes blow up on your flight. You’re probably thinking, “Oh Ken, surely they have relaxed this rule due to the onset of more advanced and powerful scanning equipment for airport security”, and you would be wrong.

Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem told media that “We are very confident that we can continue to provide hospitality to folks and for American travelers and for those visiting our country while maintaining the same standard of security for passengers and for our homeland.”

Noem’s current example of hospitality for foreigners is a detention center surrounded by alligators. Hold on to your boots everyone, it’s going to be a rough ride.